Will my baby forget about me when I return to work?
As a parent, we all have fears. Is my baby eating enough? Will I ever get more than 2 hours of sleep again? Am I parenting correctly?
Just like so many of you, I too had a parent fear. To be honest, I have a bunch of parenting fears, but for simplicity, we’ll talk about this one.
One of my biggest parenting fears was the fear that my baby would forget about me when I returned to work.
After three months of bonding, connecting, cuddling, and learning each other, it was time for me to go back to work. My emotions were all over the place!
I was anxious, angry, excited, nervous, sad, and most of all I had an extreme case of FOMO. The baby was changing every day and I was going to be at work while he was growing, learning, and meeting milestones.
At the same time, I was excited to get back to work. Being a mom requires all of you – mentally, physically, and socially.
Your needs and desires are often put to the wayside to be the best mom you can be. For me, returning to work was an opportunity for me to invest in myself again. My job fulfills me and makes me feel accomplished.
When I leave work I feel a sense of satisfaction knowing I’ve provided a much-needed service to others. Despite these feelings, as I got ready for my first day of work, I still couldn’t help but ask myself “is this even worth it?”.
Just Try
I promised myself I would give it a good try. I wanted to push through and see if the working momma life was really for me.
Fortunately, I didn’t have to worry too much about daycare. I’m grateful to have my mom as a caregiver. Growing up, my mom gave up her career to be a stay at home mom to my brother and me because she didn’t have reliable childcare.
When my husband and I revealed we were pregnant, she immediately vowed to give me an opportunity to return to work if I’d like while she cared for our baby.
I was overly appreciative to have the opportunity to drop off my son to her when I returned to work. Even still, I still couldn’t shake that feeling…would my baby forget about me?
Related Post: Breastfeeding At Work
The first day back…
I spent the drive to work in tears, trying to get it together. When I got to work my heart had a constant ache. I once tried to explain the feeling to my husband.
The best analogy I could come up with is the feeling of a breakup every day. It’s that anxious, empty gnawing on your heart.
I looked at pictures and videos all day. It helped a lot. What also helped was the support from my coworkers who were so excited for me to return. We caught up, exchanged stories, and I had a bunch of projects waiting for me to begin.
Staying busy was exactly what I needed to get through those first 8 hours.
Picking your child up after work…
When I got to my mom’s after work that day, I walked (okay maybe I ran), into the house and there my little sunshine was. He was alert and ready to come to momma!
The first thing he did was ask to nurse. For some reason that small gesture made my entire day! It was literally the best part of my day.
HE WANTED ME!
He still knew I was momma! I gladly nursed him and embraced every single moment.
Related Post: Breastfeeding Foods to Increase Your Breastmilk Supply
It takes time
I won’t say that I immediately felt better – that would be dishonest.
I will say that I made as much of an effort as possible to continue bonding and connecting with Baby Boy whenever I wasn’t working.
One thing that helped with that was breastfeeding. Breastfeeding was such a great way to maintain the bond and create an immediate reconnection when I came home from work.
I would pump while at work and immediately nurse him when I picked him up in the afternoon (check out my other breastfeeding tips here!).
Related Post: How To Stay Motivated When You’re Sleep Deprived
The fear of your child forgetting about you when you return to work is totally normal.
I was consumed with guilt and anxiety thinking my child wouldn’t bond with me the same way he did when I was at home with him on maternity leave.
In reality, there’s no place like home and there’s no one like mom.
Maternity leave allows you to establish a bond with your baby free from distractions or the stress of work.
Take full advantage of every single day you get to spend at home with your baby, but know that you can survive returning to work after your baby.
Let Me Know In The Comments
What’s your biggest parenting fear?
Lacie Wever says
👏🏾You can say that again!!! Returning to work after maternity leave is so tough!